Monday, January 25, 2010

Why this journey of perfect love?

I love the way children think us adults know everything.  Jay my 8 year old is so funny.  He is so full of questions and expects any adult to know the answer.  He has commented on more than one occassion that since I am grown and a teacher I must know the answer.  Cooper and Lucie Rose are the same.  They so innocently just expect Mama and Daddy to have the answers.  When we found out about Eli, Jay was so heartbroken.  He really has had trouble sleeping some, he  just worries.  He constantly prays for God to please heal Eli.  His first question to his daddy and me both was, "well, why can't they just do surgery and fix it?"  All of the children just knew that some grown up somewhere had the answer to baby Eli's problem.  Jamie and I had to explain to them that God was the only one that had the answers.  Now that knowledge is just second nature to them.  They just ask God to fix him now.  So do I!  I want him fixed so very badly that it hurts.  When he is born I want him to be whole.  I want him to cry, to breath, to eat, to need his mommy and daddy.  I pray that he is healed.  


Even as adults we expect someone to know the all of the answers.  When we first found out about Eli, we expected the doctors to know the answers.  We searched the internet for answers.  There just are no earthly answers.  God is the only one with ALL the answers and he does not always provide immediate feedback.  At least not when we think we need to know.  His feedback it timely and always comes when he is ready to make his will known.  His timing is perfect, just like his love.  I think that is why I feel like this is a journey of perfect love.  I know that I love Eli as much I a love my other babies.  I would give up everything for any of them even my life.  If I love them that much, I can not imagine how much He loves us.  




 




5 comments:

  1. This comment has been removed by a blog administrator.

    ReplyDelete
  2. This comment has been removed by a blog administrator.

    ReplyDelete
  3. Eli is so incredibly precious and God is most certainly using him already. (Our whole existence is to bring glory to God. Little Eli is already bringing so many to God's throne.) We love you all and are lifting Eli and you all up in prayer constantly. Thank you for sharing with us on this blog. I love you!

    ReplyDelete
  4. Jennifer, thank you for replying to my comment on Angie's blog. I'm passing your blog on to my friend momentarily. It's no accident that I've come here to read your story. God is in control! Thank you and God bless you and your precious family. I'll be following Eli's story and for the record, I believe in miracles too.

    ReplyDelete
  5. Thank you Tiffany! My email is lcjhill@yahoo.com. I would love updates on your friend. I will not cease praying for miracles for both of our babies. Miracles I believe in accidents I do not. God is in control. He always leads our way!
    Jennifer

    ReplyDelete