Those moments just seem to hit you sometimes don't they? Yesterday, I had one. It blindsided me. The neighbor's grandson is named Eli. He may be 2 or 3. I 'm not really sure. He truly is a sweet little fella. So yesterday, he came over to play with Lucie Rose. I decided Amelia and I would sit out on the front porch and rock a little while we watched the kiddos play. They had a ball outside. They jumped off of the porch and played little games. They played on the riding toys. They dug rocks from the flower bed and dumped them in the yard (Jamie ought to love that.) They just got along so well and played so nicely together. At one point Eli was digging in a part of the flower bed that has ants and without even thinking about what I was saying, I said, "Eli, be careful there are ants over there and I don't want you to get bitten." Boy did it ever hit me like a ton of bricks at that moment. This picture could have been so different. I could have been talking to two Eli's. I could have been talking to my Eli...I wanted so badly in that moment to be telling my little boy to be careful...watch out where you step. It hurt my heart so badly. The longer I sat there the more I could just picture him playing with the other kiddos.
I miss him. That is all...I miss him!